Isaac having a blast with our neighbors.
Playing soccer at our house.
Author: kimberly Page 5 of 8
Taking Calla Grace on visits has afforded many opportunities to learn more about Chadian culture! Yesterday, I took her to visit a new friend and the hostess gave me perfume to put on myself and Calla Grace. I also have learned that Chadians will never mention that she is big or heavy (even though she is 2 1/2 months old and weighing in at around 15 lbs now).
My friends think it could cause the baby to get sick if someone says it because they are afraid of an “evil eye.” (This is a good example of syncretism – an animistic belief that is deeply ingrained in many African cultures, despite the “foreign” religion of Islam that has now taken prominence in their lives.) I have learned that you should not nurse in front of a lot of people you don’t know (not for modesty’s sake, but again, because of the fear of the evil eye that could make you or your baby sick).
Calla Grace had a strange, painless bump appear on her arm a few weeks ago and our doctor friend from the States didn’t know what it was. I was visiting a few days ago and noticed two other babies similar in age to Calla Grace also had the same bump on their arm. It was then that I remembered it as the same location she received her Tuberculosis vaccine (a vaccine that is no longer given in the States, but one that everyone here still receives). I asked around and everyone showed me their small scar on their arm from the vaccine. She didn’t even cry when she got it, but now she has physical proof that she was born in Chad (other than the birth abroad certificate that Josh just picked up from the U.S. Embassy a few days ago!).
I have been blessed with many cultural opportunities these past few weeks – from being kicked out of a home, dealing with a difficult discipleship issue with a lady in the church, visiting a village and observing a woman crawling on her hands and knees out of respect as she past a group of men (no joke!), and observing a heated conversation between a group of Muslim women and our believing male friend about faith. These and other experiences have taught me how to better pray for God’s work here, and I think they are worth passing along to you who want to know how to pray for our ministry:
- Prayers of repentance for assuming pridefully that people will come to faith because of us (our skills, abilities, past experience, language ability, etc.).
- Acknowledge that God alone has the power to redeem these people – He created them in His power and it is He who made a way for their salvation.
- Ask God what it will look like for His Kingdom to come to eastern Chad- physically, emotionally, culturally, spiritually – what things will change and be reformed when people begin to follow Jesus and the Holy Spirit is doing His work of conviction and encouragement.
- Pray for God to convict people (especially of men) of their pride (in their good works or in their cultural heritage). When people encounter the True God of Scripture, may they be brought to their knees in recognition of how filthy their good deeds are and how unworthy they are apart from a Savior.
- Ask God for wisdom for us (the workers) and words to speak directly into the reality of the lives of those we are living amongst. What Scriptures will pierce their hearts?
- Pray for acceptance and favor as we walk into homes and lives of our neighbors and eventually villages. Coming in the name of Jesus sparks much skepticism here. Pray that those who welcome us into their families and communities will recognize the peace, joy, love, and other fruits of the Spirit in our lives (and not confuse those things with our material blessings that we inevitably enjoy from being white).
- Pray for unity amongst the teams who are here -specifically our team and the other 4-adult team (from another organization) as well as on translator working with our chosen people group.
- Pray for us as we begin to brainstorm how to best enter villages/homes with the gospel (practical ministry ideas and how to bless the people’s physical needs).
On our drive to Abeche, we had LOTS of luggage piled high on our vehicle. We prayed at the beginning of the trip for God to keep us and our thing safe. Isaac (4 1/2) asked if that meant God was going to come down, put his arms around the things on top of our car, and make sure they don’t fall off. It was such a literal interpretation of what we were praying for, but we are thankful to share with you that despite one scary moment where I (mom) thought we would topple over sideways when pulling off the side of the road, God did keep us and all our belongings safe!
We are back home in our town and excited to continue in language learning so we can deepen relationships here as well as make new friends. I was visiting with one friend yesterday who has been severely wronged, but who has also made sinful choices and is seeing some immediate consequences of those choices. It is painful to walk alongside someone who has no frame of reference for the kind of forgiveness that God in Christ offers us or for the kind of forgiveness He expects us to have for others. How do I talk to someone about Jesus teaching to forgive 70×7 when they have yet to accept God’s forgiveness for their own sins? I have a renewed sense of sadness for my friends here who are living in hopeless situations apart from God. How do they even want to continue? I am burdened even more to pray that the truths that we share would take root in the hearts of our friends here and transform their lives, families, and communities. Will you pray with me in this new year that we would be purposeful to speak of truth, hope, and forgiveness to our friends here and that many would believe and turn from their sins?
Christmastime is a time where we tend to practice hospitality maybe more than other times of the year, so I have been thinking about this a little more the past few days. Josh and I recognize this as one of the gifts God has given us that we both share, and it is fun for us to have the opportunity to practice this gift together. Especially in Chad, we have many opportunities to host people in our home and show hospitality – both to Chadians and fellow workers from the West.
I was remembering with thanksgiving the ways that God has allowed us to use our home to show hospitality to others this past year. Abeche is a town many people travel through, but there are not many places for people to stop for the night if needed.
Before we ever moved into our home, a Chadian believer was occasionally sleeping in our compound on his way to and from other towns. Then, the week before we moved, we hosted a volunteer team from America who slept at our house (we were still living at the Orphanage guest housing in our town).
Since living in our home, we have hosted a Chadian family overnight for several days; fed lunch to countless men who worked to make our house a home; hosted a western NGO worker for a water drilling organization several different times overnight; hosted a man who lived here for 10 years working on Bible translation but who currently works from the States; hosted another Bible translator and church planter who lives a few hours from us; turned a spare room on our compound into a “studio apartment” for our nanny and teammate, Danielle; hosted the Blackfords who came on a vision trip and then decided to join our team; hosted two men, Ben and Matt, from our home church; and this coming week while we are still in N’Djamena, a new team in country will be staying at our house for several days while they make plans to move to Abeche in the near future.
In addition to providing a roof, a mattress, and at least a meal or two to all of these people, we were also able to use our spare room as a language learning space for another worker in our town.
I am excited that we are able to use the home God provided us to bless many other people as they go about the His work in our area. I pray this continues, and I am certain it will. We already have two or three groups from America scheduled to come out next year – all these will be for the purpose of mobilizing the church in America to missions in Chad.
Do you have the gift of hospitality? Do you find you can use it more during a certain season of the year? How do you hope to show hospitality this coming year in a way that furthers God’s kingdom? I’d love to hear how you practice hospitality in your own home!
Due to technical difficulties (Africa?!), I am re-posting this entry. The entire story did not get published yesterday. Here’s the entire post; hopefully it will make more sense now. 🙂
If you visit weather.com these days and do a search on N’Djamena, Chad you will notice the temperature has gotten much cooler – it was only 64 degrees when we woke up this morning.
Isaac and Judah came into our house yesterday morning with much excitement because their friend next door (an American boy who lives on this compound) had an extra hoodie jacket to share with Isaac. You would have thought it was Christmas! Isaac started to take off his long sleeved shirt until I asked him why. He said he wanted to put the jacket on, so I explained that the jacket goes over his shirt to keep him warm. “Oh!” he exclaimed. “So,” he said thinking about it, “I put my shirt on, and then I can put the jacket on over and I will stay warm!” We just laughed – my ‘third culture kids’ don’t really remember what a jacket is since we only need one about 6 weeks out of the entire year!
Why is it cooler now? It’s typically a little cooler during the morning and evening hours this time of year, but weather.com explains that we are also experiencing a “widespread dust covering” – also known as a “harmattan”- a cold-dry and dusty trade wind, blowing over the West African subcontinent. This northeasterly wind blows from the Sahara Desert into the Gulf of Guinea between the end of the November and the middle of March (winter).
Prayer point: This story made me remember the many beggar boys who are sent off to faraway towns, away from all family, to learn the Quran for a few years. They often are found sleeping in the markets at night and begging for money and food during the day. Many don’t have shoes or warm clothes to wear, something that makes for an even more uncomfortable night’s sleep this time of year. Pray for the thousands of boys throughout Chad who are needy both physically and spiritually. Pray for us to know how to best minister to the beggar boys in our neighborhood when we return home soon.
about to leave for the hospital!
4 days past my due date on Sunday morning, November 8, 2015, I woke up before the rest of the family full of energy and feeling better than I had in a long time. I became very sick on Friday with what I thought might be food poisoning or a virus. I rested a lot that day and felt better Saturday. Little did I know, it was my body’s way of preparing for labor.
As Josh cooked our breakfast that morning, I spent time reading on the couch with Isaac and Judah. I enjoyed the time with them because they have been so busy playing on the playground where we have been staying in N’Djamena that they have not spent as much time as normal. I then helped Josh set the table and thought I felt some contractions coming on – stronger than Braxton Hicks but I was afraid to get my hopes up. At 7am, I sat down to a delicious breakfast of coffee, banana, and eggs with a special addition of bacon jerky that a friend from church sent as a gift. As I was eating, I told the family I needed to go sit on the cushioned chair because I thought I was having contractions. I finished eating, but they kept coming every 10 minutes or less so I told Josh he needed to get things in the truck. We were all very calm. Josh took a fast shower and I told him I didn’t want him to take too much time because they seemed to be coming pretty close together. It takes almost an hour to get to the hospital under normal conditions. The boys went outside to play and at 9:30 am, we snuck out so they wouldn’t get upset if they saw us leaving. I wanted so bad to tell them good-bye. Josh spent a couple minutes mounting our new Go-Pro camera so we could share what the drive looked like with our friends and family. I got irritated at that because I wanted to just get going.
My doctor wasn’t answering her personal cell phone, so en route, I called the hospital line and started explaining who I was in French and that we were on our way to the hospital. She said, “Hey!” in English and then I realized who I was talking to. I explained everything and she said she would see me when I got there. We passed the president’s palace – still on paved roads – rounded the corner and saw the Chari River to the left of us. We were thanking God that I was laboring on a Sunday. There was no traffic at 9:30 am which made our drive much shorter than it would normally be! What a blessing! We thanked the Lord. In addition, I had noticed at breakfast time that it was quite overcast that day. It makes the drive much more pleasant when the sun is not beating down on us. So, during the drive, in between contractions, I was very comfortable. Another blessing! We thanked God again.
We finally made it to the dirt road turnoff. I knew it would be about 20 minutes on this road before we made it to the hospital. I told Josh to prepare to stop completely when each contraction came. I couldn’t imagine going over bumps during the contractions! That plan worked well for me, and I started timing them so I could tell the doctor a general number of minutes. They were ranging from 9 minutes to 6 minutes apart.
the midwife listening to the heartbeat
We made it to the hospital around 10 am with no problems. They checked my blood pressure, dilation, etc. and then I settled into my private hospital room, where I planned to labor, recover, and leave before dark with baby in arms. I walked the sidewalk up and down the private section the hospital. Thankfully, there were no other patients occupying rooms, so I had privacy except for the distant visitors who could see me walking. God blessed me with a beautiful flowering bush full of bright pink flowers. It was a time for me to celebrate the coming of my baby girl. I haven’t seen many flowering bushes since dry season is upon us, so I counted this plant as a gift from God to get me through the next few hours. I was able to pray some as I walked, thanking God for how He orchestrated the morning and declaring my trust in Him for the delivery.
these flowers were growing right outside our room
walking around the hospital as labor progressed.
Josh walked with me, and around 11am, my friend Erica came to take photos of the birth. She is due in December, and she will be having her baby at the same hospital and then moving out to our town in the east of Chad. So, it was a great opportunity for her to see how things are done at the hospital and also a great opportunity for me, because I got good photos out of the arrangement and she was a calm, hands-off photographer.
My doctor came for a visit and told me that my face said all she needed to know. Contractions were coming closer together, so we decided to break my water to get things moving. I wanted to stay in my room to deliver, but the Dr. Andrea felt more comfortable delivering in the proper delivery room, so I said ok. Josh gathered up the battery fan, some hand fans, a bottle of Gatorade, and a few other items for after the birth. We started walking the dirt path to the delivery room, but I had to stop in the middle to get through a contraction. Many Chadians on the public side of the hospital were watching me and I was standing in the sun, but it didn’t matter. All I needed to do was make it through the contraction so I could continue walking. I told Josh he could go ahead and get set up. Erica was behind me if I needed help.
gathered the essentials to head over to the delivery room
I had another contraction as I entered the maternity ward, so I leaned against the wall. The midwife told me to go into the delivery room but I needed to wait until the contraction finished. I made it into the delivery room and had yet another contraction. They were coming very close together. I waited until it finished to climb into the bed. I didn’t want to labor in bed any longer than necessary.
Dr. Andrea, a missionary doctor from England, was amazing and we appreciate her so much!
The doctor came in and broke my water at 12 noon. We found meconium in the water, so Dr. Andrea let me labor for a few more minutes; then she said we really needed to get the baby out because of the risk of aspirating the meconium. So she helped the process along and the baby was born naturally at 12:25 pm crying loudly! As she was crowning, the doctor and midwife described her head of hair as no different from the Chadians. I didn’t know exactly what they meant, but once she was born, we were shocked at the amount of black hair she had! Our two boys didn’t have much hair when they were born.
I got to snuggle Calla Grace Rosemary and nurse her (she latched on great the first try!) and when I was ready a while later they weighed her (9lbs 4oz). I went to the maternity ward and they brought a wheelchair to wheel me back to my private room for recovery. Josh took the baby and walked ahead of us. We got greeted in Arabic by the group of women outside the hospital. They had lots of smiles and blessings for us. We were proud parents! My midwife mentioned how strange it was for the Chadian women to see a father attend the delivery and carry the baby. We pray there was small testimony of our faith that was displayed as these women saw my husband serving and loving his wife and daughter during this special time.
Calla Grace was supposed to be released the same day of her birth, but due to the meconium in the amniotic fluid, she began showing early symptoms of infection so we stayed overnight. She developed a fever and had low oxygen saturation scores the following day. We started her on antibiotics and ended up staying 6 nights in the hospital with her during her recovery. We worried she had something else going on with her heart or lungs, so on Friday, she and I took an ambulance to another hospital for a chest x-ray. That was the only moment in the entire experience that I regretted being in Africa! It was stressful because I was in the front seat of the ambulance, very close to the windshield, and there was no air conditioning and no siren to warn the traffic that we were coming. Also, Josh wasn’t with me because he went into town to drop the boys off for lunch. I had to call him, ask him if he knew where central hospital was, and meet me there. All tests came back normal and two other American pediatricians in country said Saturday that the levels were not low enough to be worrisome. So, on Saturday afternoon, a week after her birth, we took Calla Grace Rosemary Meyer home to her family! Praise God for His faithfulness to us during both the beautiful day of labor and delivery and also during the following week of challenges.
About her name: Calla lilies made up my wedding bouquet and the word Calla means beautiful in Greek. Calla Grace’s name means “Beautiful Grace.” Her birth and life is already a small testimony of God’s beautiful grace to us. We added Rosemary as a tribute to my maternal grandmother who lives in Athens, Georgia.
I met with my midwife last weekend and she gave me lots of advice on what to pack for giving birth in a Chadian hospital…I thought some of you might be interested to see the updated list:
- mosquito net
- coffee
- flashlight
- hand fans
- toilet paper
- a Chadian mat to put on the ground in case Josh or I need a place on the floor to rest.
Does anything on this list surprise you?!
Our family moved to the capital a week and a half ago. We settled in quickly – the boys have lots of American friends to play with on the SIL (Bible Translators) compound where we are staying. They are currently digging for frogs, but they also enjoy climbing on the playground equipment, jumping on the trampoline, and borrowing books from the campus library – all right outside our doorstep!
While the boys are busy playing, we’ve been visiting the doctor and midwife and getting blood work done. We’ve also been packing for our time at the hospital. Most things are similar to what I would pack to deliver a baby in America, but here, the hospital provides very little. So far, this is what is in my hospital bag or on my list to pack:
- Bottled (filtered) water and Gatorade in our cooler
- Snacks for me and Josh (for during and after labor – there are no restaurants around)
- Bedsheets and pillow
- All comfort items to help during labor
- All postpartum supplies (none provided by hospital)
- Diapers, swaddle blanket, baby hat, onesie, coming home outfit (also not provided)
As you can see, there is nothing too crazy on the list, but I am definitely having to think of everything, because the hospitals here just don’t provide things other than the actual medical care items.